I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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