I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize