there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
