Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
