yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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