im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
