You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
