I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
