they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
