FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I met the friendliest cop last night
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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