I wannas sexs uuuuu
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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