i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
whose ass print is on the piano?
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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