big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize