i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I touched a dick in church today
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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