He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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