11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
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