Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES