Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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