non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
someone owes me an orgasm
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Randomize
