therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
