We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
