i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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