why didn't you poke me back
just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Randomize
