How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize