just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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