Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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