its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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