he wants to bone in the snuggie
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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