just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Randomize