I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
The air taste purple.
Randomize