It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
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