can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
