just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
