I hope mine doesn't look like that
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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