Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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