whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
