Cold hands, warm shart.
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
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