Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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