Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Randomize
