So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
