I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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