All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
