I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
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