there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
