in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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