A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
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He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
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Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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