I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I enjoy the company of your penis
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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