i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
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Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
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Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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