So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
why is half of my head shaved?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
