I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
