Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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